The Dispair of Hope and the Relief of Resignation

There is no light at the end of the tunnel. There is no happily ending and no 'happily ever after.' It's all an illusion; a mirage that we will never reach. It doesn't exist.

At least not in the way we think of it.

If we wait for circumstances to bring us out of our depression, if we wait for events outside of ourselves to cheer us up, if we think to ourselves 'my trial will be over when X happens,' then we will never be satisfied. When we do this we are expecting our trial to be Abraham's trial, where we get back the same thing we were resigned to lose. However, if we expect it back then we really aren't resigned in the first place and we fail the test. Even if our trial is similar in kind to Abraham's and that which we lost is returned to us, it will still never be the same because of the irreversible changes the trial has caused in us.

The only hope we have is to embrace our trial; to desire more tests and to long after greater challenges. We must convince ourselves that life under duress is normal and life any other way is abnormal. We must not seek to 'get through' or 'survive' the trial as this mentality assumes and looks forward to an end. Rather, we must assume life under trial is the way it always will be; yes, even the way it should be.

Waiting for that one event or that one sign that our trial is over, whether it be a job, health, or the end of school, is chasing a pipe dream. It's not coming. Anything that makes us think our trial is over is merely a tease. So stop hoping for relief and learn to legitimately enjoy the trial that life is. It's your only hope.