The Strange Longings of an Ex-Student

As this time of year comes around I am feeling something strange. People around me are scurrying around, trying to finish what they have to do before it's too late. Friends excuse themselves to write papers and study for tests. Facebook statuses bemoan due dates and unfinished assignments. As I see all of this end of the semester activity as an observer and not a participant for the first time, unfamiliar emotions creep into my being.

Could it be withdrawals? Do I actually miss the stress of completing academic assignments?

For the last couple of years I did not particularly enjoy this time of year. I looked forward to the break and usually did not worry too much about my assignments. But as I wrote my papers at the end of the last few semesters I wished that I could be finished. I exhibited all the symptoms of Senioritis and longed for the freedom I believed graduation would grant me.

However, now that I no longer have the deadlines and test dates I find myself almost jealous of those that must still worry about their scholastic activities. I miss writing papers late at night and showing off my raw intelligence by barely studying for what were supposed to be difficult tests.

Perhaps it's because I miss the sense of accomplishment I got from doing well (enough) on all my assignments. Perhaps it's because I miss that sense of purpose. Perhaps it's because I'm still a nerd.